Who is she? let me know??

Ok so today is day 10 and its a fast day and boy do i need it!!, I'm so happy i get this unbelievable high when i start a fast because i feel so much control, it's addictive, i love everytime i say "No Thanks, I've just eaten," when i'm offered food it's such a great feeling!. I've already fooled everyone into thinking I'm a massive eater when i'm at home ofcourse,

It's great, on the days i have broken and binged at work, they think "oh that's typical, she eats like she has hollow legs," hahahahaha no i eat like i havent eaten in days and iveliquified my diet for days yeah solids are real hard to resist! but this new diet im trying is Fantastic, although some of the calorie intake is a litle high for me to eat/drink in a day so i minus a few hundred here and there, (never plus; that's just impossible) i eat like i should be smaller although im not!, It's a strange feeling when you look in the mirror and there is this massive girl looking back at you, sitting in your chair, wearing what looks like could be your clothes? it doesnt make sence? all i know is i hate her! i hate the way she sits there looking at me like im disusting? i dont want her here anymore! i want her gone! so here i am Day 10! slowly she will go, she will disappear! i can not wait until she does!

but although thru all the ugliness i am thankful i do have someone i can come home to, someone that will make sure that things stay on the ok level, its really true dont let the ED own you you need to own it, let it assist you in acheiving your goals but do not let it isolate you, this is when things get bad for me i need to be around people, i have read another blog whom i abosolutly love, she said that (not quoting) having anorexia is admirable because you are livng with it, people dying from it is not living with it, well thats what i got from what she said, :/ BTW im not sure who the ana angel is on the top of the page but anyone with information on her please let me know!!!! i do love her and would like as many pics on her as i can find! she is beautiful! i love the way she wears her bones with pride!


well i must go now, im sonna sleep in the best way tonight..... n an empty stomache!


starve on beauties!