=|\\\ F%#&@!!!! :=="='''||||

Well it's happened again!, we fought, he flipped, I cried (I HATE MYSELF FOR CRYING!!!!), he took my keys, I locked him out the house, he had his house keys, I tried to barricade myself in the house, he pushed the door, my back went thru the wall, he pounded on the door, I ran out onto the street crying (I HATE MYSELF FOR CRYING!!!!!) he smashed my sewing machine, I just learnt how to take my clothes in using it, he called me a slut cunt whore told me he cheated on me all day, I sat at home waiting for him after he left the house 4 times in one day, he ran to his uncles and told me he gets the house and I can have the car, I sat and packed in my trashed house, I want to die, he doesn't care, I can't eat, he doesn't care, I can't sleep, he doesn't care. So WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?!!!@!&&$??!! Why am I fighting to keep something that I know is over!,
Do I like the pain?!!
Do I love him?
Or am I just scared of being alone?
Can I function alone?
Who I am with out him?!
Can I go on?
Do I want to?!
What am I doing?!$@@??!!!,
It starts with 2
After 2, you can't lose that feeling
It's a drug that heats up the pain to a boil that can only feel good
It's a release from the pain the drama the hurt that doesn't quit
It's what I wake up for and look forward to its the only thing that makes sense
It's scary it feels this good
It's coming back and growing with me like ana did the first time we met its as comfy as she is warming me at night it's worrying it's great it's freaky but the good kind you can't live without can I do it and hide it who would care
Would I?
Do I?
Can I?

No